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Postby Nesaie » Mon Apr 13, 2009 5:53 pm

Old joke:

Redneck Wedding Night Billy Joe and Mary Sue, newly joined in holy matrimony, are spending their wedding night at the Motel 6 Honeymoon Suite in Booneville, Arkansas.

They’ve abstained from the dirty deed until this very night. Justas Billy Joe is about to make love to his new wife for the first time, she stops him. "Wait, Billy Joe. I just thought you should know...this ain’t just our first time...this here is my first time ever. I’m a virgin.

I been savin’ myself just for you. ""Whut you say, Mary Sue?"

"I said, I’m a virgin...one hunnert percent cherry. Just for you on ourweddin’ night.""Yor a VIRGIN??"

"That’s right, Billy Joe. Please be gentle." "Gentle?? Gentle my ass. I’m outta here! "With that, Billy Joe pulls up his pants, slams out the door, jumps in his pickup, and drives back home across the tracks.

"Paw! Paw! Wake up! Yor not gonna believe this."

"Huh?" Billy Joe, whut the hell you doin’ here? It’s 3 a.m. on yor weddin’night.Why the hell ain’t you and that purdy new wife of yors in a haystack somewhere makin’ like rabbits?""Paw, I wuz all set to do just that when Mary Sue up and tells me that she’s a virgin." "A VIRGIN??"

"That’s right, Paw...a hunnert percent cherry. As soon as she told me Igot the hell outta there as fast as I could."

"Well, son, lemme tell you, you did the right thing, cuz if she ain’t good enough fer her own family, she certainlyain’t good enough fer ours."


http://www.famousquotesandjokes.com/jokes/4/27/10/
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Postby Lashmar » Tue Apr 14, 2009 1:42 am

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby Nesaie » Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:27 am

Glad you liked it. There are plenty more jokes about the south, not just about the inbreeding. :)

Didn't you mention something about the people of the south in some post? Were you talking of the UK or the US? Either way, I prefer people in the north of both countries.
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Postby Lashmar » Wed Apr 15, 2009 2:13 am

I was on about the US. :lol:

Been to the north of England?
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Postby Nesaie » Wed Apr 15, 2009 4:47 am

Never been to England, I'm not sure I even want to visit. But, I did meet a man from Yorkshire a couple years back. They have a more gutteral accent than those who speak the "queen's" English. Those I've met who speak the "queen's" English have always turned out to be...well, I won't be "vulgar" (to use a French/latin term...what happened to Germanic English? :evil: ).

Personally, I'd rather party with the Irish. :D Well, the Irish from the south anyway. You Brits really did a number on those from the North of Ireland. They can't even laugh at themselves any more thanks to you people...and Cromwell :twisted: As I've been told, it is still a war.

Oh, and never ask a person from Belfast if they're a leprechaun. ;)
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Postby Nesaie » Wed Apr 15, 2009 4:52 am

Besides, my country is bigger than yours. :P

I'd like to explore the US first, as I have time and money, before I ever travel over the pond. I at least want to go to Alaska and Hawaii before anything in Europe. After that, I may consider visiting the country side of the UK, mostly Scotland...a bit of Wales...and if time a bit in the north of England. But, Ireland first, I like the people, the songs, the music, etc. :D I like their culture.
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Postby Lashmar » Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:17 am

You do know nobody speaks like the queen don’t you. ;)

Go to the West Country, much better than the Celtic bastards, it’s fun down there. :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zbtAxQdZcU

Oddly they do speak like that, not the accent but the use of English. :lol:
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Postby Nesaie » Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:36 am

Lashmar wrote:You do know nobody speaks like the queen don’t you. ;)

Go to the West Country, much better than the Celtic bastards, it’s fun down there. :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zbtAxQdZcU

Oddly they do speak like that, not the accent but the use of English. :lol:


Ah...we are all proud of where we're born aren't we?

BTW, I liked that youtube. It reminds me of an old pub (here in the states with those "FOBs" fresh off the boat). :D

What is wrong with the Celts?

Oh Bloody 'ell, I hear birds chirpin', that must mean its morning (or mourning) here. And for us in the US, that means its "tax day".

For you as a Brit (my favorite band ever), a video in remembrance:

http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=t ... aq=-1&oq=#

God rest their souls.

(Oh, mael claims he has that accent. I'm thinking poor little rich boy myself ;))
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Postby Lashmar » Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:43 am

it's just fun to poke fun at the Celts. :lol:
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Postby Lashmar » Wed Apr 15, 2009 9:39 am

Nesaie wrote:But, I did meet a man from Yorkshire a couple years back. They have a more gutteral accent than those who speak the "queen's" English.


This should make you laugh. :lol:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe1a1wHx ... re=related

And they’re just like that. “I used to live in a match box, and I had to share it with a spider”
:lol:
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