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Monergism vs Synergism

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Postby sandra » Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:51 pm

at1with0 wrote:
sandra wrote:People that are around you, people here, people in your home life, people who have been in your life.

..which wouldn't be very many. It seems as though you think I should be carrying people. Been there, done that. Where did that get me?? The best way to carry people is to let them carry themselves. Who carried me?

What do you think they think of you....let me tell you because I already know.

Why should I care?

You cannot know all the things you do and play dumb. People know, they are aware
of your awareness whether you understand that or not, and they know where their awareness fits into that, that often times you are aware of more informations. You thinking little of yourself is not taking responsibility for your informations, guess what that gives them...

Why is it so much about them? About what I can do for other people? What about me working on me for the moment? Lawd knows I need a lot of improvement. I certainly don't feel like some kind of oracle for people. Who would I be dispensing this information to anyway? I can think of one person who might be partially receptive. That's it.


It does not give them hope, it does not give them love, it does not give them peace,
it does not give them compassion.

Why is it up to me to give people these things? Are you assuming that my true nature is all touchy feely airy fairy pink cloud sort of thing? Have you not been paying attention?? Hey, it would be nice to accumulate wisdom if that were even possible and dispense it to people like a guru but like I said I've been there and done that and it's gotten me right here right now with you trying to tell me what I ought to be doing with my life and, sister, I don't let anyone else define for me what I am or what I should be doing. If I did, I'm shore there's a horde of people who think I ought to do different, and I would lose my will to live in trying to live up to other people's standards, like yours. Maybe I'm a lost cause you're wasting your time with. I do find it curious though, and there's more of course. Much more, in fact.

Give someone drugs for a month, I like that. It has happened, as you might know.
Not exactly nice, no, but it's who I was at the time.


lmfao :lol:

Opened up the flood gates. :lol:

And who is it that you think I am, some fairy sissy a**,
I'm built tough like ford baby. :lol:
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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Postby sandra » Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:54 pm

What is important is that you got the information, that is what is important as it was needed whether right now you can see that or not, I have no care for see, don't need to.
Everything is good. You think I have gone through nothing to get this far...
Now is a different time in your life. My standards.. I try to care for the people in my
life the best that I can, and what I have offered is nothing less to you. No you had not told
me about giving someone drugs for a month but those were the words I chose to get that certain point across. Now I see it is time for me to chill and thats ok.
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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Location: Minnesota US

Postby bionic » Tue Dec 14, 2010 12:01 am

Maybe God observes us and when he/she/it/them see something worth "saving", something kicks in to start or speed up a process laying, maybe dorment within us?
A switch gets turned on.
I'm just pondering..tossing ideas about
I am more a beleiver of an incrementally, back and forth, and all over road to God..that we are all on..at our own speeds. (which in one's journey can go faster at some points, and slower, and even backwards..chutes and ladders style, as we go)

There's also the theory that until 'all are saved..none are saved'
in other words..we go as a group or none of us do..each one of us responsible for all of us..we are "our brothers keeper", after all
Willie Wonka quotes..
What is this Wonka, some kind of funhouse?
Why? Are you having fun?
A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.
We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams
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Postby sandra » Tue Dec 14, 2010 12:09 am

Yeah perfect timing. Chutes and ladders style I like that.
Good feeling in reading those words. :|
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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sandra
 
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Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 6:27 pm
Location: Minnesota US

Postby at1with0 » Tue Dec 14, 2010 1:05 pm

What are we being saved from?

sandra wrote:What is important is that you got the information, that is what is important as it was needed whether right now you can see that or not, I have no care for see, don't need to.
Everything is good. You think I have gone through nothing to get this far...
Now is a different time in your life. My standards.. I try to care for the people in my
life the best that I can, and what I have offered is nothing less to you. No you had not told
me about giving someone drugs for a month but those were the words I chose to get that certain point across. Now I see it is time for me to chill and thats ok.


Hehe, no I didn't give anyone DRUGS for a month literally, but the effects of being around me seem similar at times.


You think I have gone through nothing to get this far...
Assumption. One of several, in fact. I think more highly of you than you realize as evidenced by this remark.

Indeed: your standards. I make a point of it to not live by other people's standards. Usually, what other people's opinions are regarding how I should live my life and how I should spend my "currency" is worthless.

Some sincerely asked questions went unanswered so it probably is time to "chill." If only half the information is dispensed, then what good is it?
"it is easy to grow crazy"
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Postby sandra » Tue Dec 14, 2010 1:18 pm

at1with0 wrote:Indeed: your standards. I make a point of it to not live by other people's standards. Usually, what other people's opinions are regarding how I should live my life and how I should spend my "currency" is worthless.


Your currency just remember has been added to greatly. :lol:
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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sandra
 
Posts: 3702
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 6:27 pm
Location: Minnesota US

Postby at1with0 » Tue Dec 14, 2010 1:51 pm

I'm saving for the rainy day which seems almost a foregone conclusion. Sometimes I fancy myself a soldier in boot camp.
One major thing I took from your writings, one of many, was that I have been acknowledged and yes that sort of faaaades away and I don't know what to do with it. Did you read the Arcanist Probation poem when I linked to it? It does have a lot to do with what we're talking about, the WHAT that is DOING the acknowledging. Despite your failure to see the relevance.

In fact, everything seems to fade in the present moment. I have had some really profound experiences that I forget. One time I was sitting cross-legged under a streetlight at night and I could feel with my hands and arms a pressure between me and the ground. Seeing, as Don Juan might put it. Seeing the energy exuded by the planet and the forces that be. (Not of course with the eyes, that's not what Don Juan meant.) Then a flash like a photo was seen against the surrounding areas and the pressure went away. I saw with my own eyes three people in a house suddenly illuminated and the woman asked the man, "did you see that?" It was some kind of vision. Visions are few and far between but I value them immensely though they, too, fade in the present moment. Why is that? Maybe my brain would be on overload. There have been several; I wish I had documented them. I am altering the doses on the herbal supplements I take so as to hopefully make me less absent minded. My mind is dulled, like Chambers of Dis of Morbid Angel fame. But really I would like to share the experience of awakening/transformation with others but I don't see how to, or even if that would be a good thing. I feel as though I am on some personal quest ("my answer" thread in Q's) but I'm not even sure what the objectives are. Almost certain of it.

Then again I'm kind of toasted at the moment. rofl

Your words affected me to the point where I lost my feeling of centeredness but I have gotten it back, as it were. And maybe I should be knocked off my center for what I'm apparently wasting. From the center, movement in any direction is possible. Say that reminds me of another poem which I won't quote here as THAT would be wasted though it has a lot to do with definers of my worth and what not.
"it is easy to grow crazy"
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Postby sandra » Tue Dec 14, 2010 2:16 pm

No I did not fail to see the relevance.
What was happening there looks simple right.
It was revision, serious revision and refining from
things of the far past til now
that will add to all of what you have already created
and to all that you will. In the land of meaning, of
intention, of efficiency and timing etc.
I put things in a different order there.
Nothing you do or say is a waste, but believe me,
the dark places you can go, I can go just the same if
need be and come out cleaner than I came in.
So lets not assume that I am naive in what I share,
as I'm like you, always proving differently. And I
acknowledged what I wanted to for good reasons.
Give me a chance in getting to know me, if there is room
for you there is room for me. Now arcanist probation was
hot yes. I haven't read your 'my answer thread' but I'll be sure
to check it out.

Fading in the present moment? Maybe your mind would be on overload otherwise..
yes good one there. That is the truth. That is why compassion and consideration
for others can be important. The deep things of the past to you will someday
be like when you were a child, simple, effortless in knowing and being,
and so you have more space and comfort to learn more.
Exactly part of what I have been sharing with you.
Right now your perspective of others, its ok to sometimes
see them as innocent, as children at times because many do not
know better, and sometimes, many times, it is not all of their fault
that they are the way they are.

This all took time. No matter what hope you know I'm
always going to be there for you if you ever needed me.
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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Postby at1with0 » Tue Dec 14, 2010 2:30 pm

Coming out cleaner than before is precisely my intention when exploring the depths of darkness. It is as useful as exploring the depths of love, grace, peace and bliss. My opinion, of course. My name is my goal: to be at one with nothing. They can both be addictions.

I am quite fond of you, and your words are not wasted upon me despite whatever it might seem like. And I try to not need anything but if I did need someone on the internet it's you. Sorry that seems so .. idk, qualified. Yes, very fond. I see you as an oracle and I am amazed often at what you have to say. I wonder how you got to be this way after so few years. I believe you have been cleansed many times and things are seen clearly for you, unlike my journey which was filled with being trapped in darkness and light, both of which I am morbidly obsessed with in my endeavor to be at one with nothing. The Center, or whatever you wish to call it.

A raft is important for getting across the river but once done, the raft is discarded. One "raft" was to believe my mind was a committee with light, dark, and neutral forces comprising it. About 3 years ago, I acknowledged and accepted the dark influence as one of many. I feel more complete today than then. But the committee idea doesn't really serve me any longer.
"it is easy to grow crazy"
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Postby sandra » Tue Dec 14, 2010 10:30 pm

at1with0 wrote:Coming out cleaner than before is precisely my intention when exploring the depths of darkness. It is as useful as exploring the depths of love, grace, peace and bliss. My opinion, of course.


Yes.... but more can be done and more can happen and change and be created by reasoning, with what reasoning we are dealing with. As it is never my intent to explore darkness, but to stay in Love. As I stay in Love, at times if I peek around I find I'm knee high in some shish and it can become dangerous even perceiving anything outside during these times. I've helped people in my life that are not what I would have at the time considered to be in any even decent condition, that might be an understatement. But in understanding there is not much fear. And in Vibration and frequency, things are managed. Thats all a good thing to touch on and I mentioned this, because there is a wide range of informations in this area and not something often spoke of.

My name is my goal: to be at one with nothing. They can both be addictions.

As a contrary how do you know that nothing is not everything? Sorry I really giggled reading that, because you are soo contrary at times and its just who you are .. Sometimes you talk straight and other times I have to pay attention as to what you are expressing.


I am quite fond of you, and your words are not wasted upon me despite whatever it might seem like. And I try to not need anything but if I did need someone on the internet it's you. Sorry that seems so .. idk, qualified. Yes, very fond. I see you as an oracle and I am amazed often at what you have to say. I wonder how you got to be this way after so few years. I believe you have been cleansed many times and things are seen clearly for you, unlike my journey which was filled with being trapped in darkness and light, both of which I am morbidly obsessed with in my endeavor to be at one with nothing. The Center, or whatever you wish to call it.


Well I don't know what an oracle is but I'm guessing its something good, really have not heard much of that word. But a part of me is happy to know that you are fond of me as I have a sense of that in good things.
My life without a doubt, will always be dedicated to knowing and loving Christ while having good relations. Along with that I enjoy my life and still have a wild side.
Things that I talk about here on the vault are things the people around me in my life, my friends, my family, they would know it as.. me. And it has taken time for many of the changes that
have come in my life and in the peoples around me, but all of them, they are wonderful
people. Very loving and accepting, I'm dear to them and do not take it for granted.
Your modules will come to one...to at1. There has already been a big shift there.
Some important things in my life story remain inside of me for now.


A raft is important for getting across the river but once done, the raft is discarded. One "raft" was to believe my mind was a committee with light, dark, and neutral forces comprising it. About 3 years ago, I acknowledged and accepted the dark influence as one of many. I feel more complete today than then. But the committee idea doesn't really serve me any longer.


Yes I understand the ideas and learning behind the raft idea but have not heard much of
such a committee. I believe we always have a committee of spirits with us though.
“Living backwards!” Alice repeated in great
astonishment. “I never heard of such a thing!”
“—but there’s one great advantage in it, that one’s
memory works both ways.”
— Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking-Glass
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sandra
 
Posts: 3702
Joined: Fri Dec 04, 2009 6:27 pm
Location: Minnesota US

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