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Create the Punchline
August 19, 2014
4:56 am
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gudskepteacal
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First read this in a local periodical and it literally had me Laughing Out Loud for so long there were tears in my eyes...

-- The story of Kopi Luwak coffee is by now a News of the Weird staple, begun in 1993 with the first reports that a super-premium market existed for coffee beans digested by certain Asian civet cats, collected, washed and brewed. In June, news broke that civets were being mistreated -- captured from the wild and caged solely for their bean-adulterating usefulness. In August the American Chemical Society reported that a "gas chromatography and mass spectrometry" test had finally been developed to assure buyers that their $227-a-pound Kopi Luwak beans had, indeed, been excreted by genuine Asian civets. (Thus, Kopi Luwak drinkers, at up to $80 a cup in California, can sip their brews without fear of being ripped off.) [USA Today, 9-11-2013]

Keep Reading: http://newsoftheweird.com/archive/nw131013.html

:wtf: Laugh :crazy:

They had to test it NOT to assure themselves that the cats being used as a middleman was a myth...but to guarantee that it was true! Laugh Laugh "That's funny right there; I don't care who you are." Some people have way too much money and time on their hands.

Anyway, I thought it would be fun to let yall supply your own punchline to the article; of which about half a dozen instantly sprang to mind after reading it. In deference to John's wishes, please try to keep it moderately clean. Laugh

"History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and its issuance." - James Madison

August 19, 2014
6:12 am
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frrostedman
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"Marge? You mean to tell me you've been serving me instant coffee?"

"Oh no, Thelma. This isn't just instant coffee. It's Folger's Crystals. Coffee rich enough to be served in America's finest coffee houses."

"And what are those light-colored crystals I see in the jar?"

"It's what I call flavor enhancers... they are your assurance that it's Folgers Mountain Grown crystals... which makes it the richest, most aromatic coffee."

"Really?"

"No. Not really, you miserable fool. It's just cat litter that stuck to the turds dug I out of the litter box this morning. Now shut up and drink."

Every one who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that a spirit is manifest in the laws of the Universe-a spirit vastly superior to that of man. - Albert Einstein

August 19, 2014
6:26 am
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gudskepteacal
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😆 :clap:

"History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and its issuance." - James Madison

September 1, 2014
2:00 am
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Lightwolf
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80 freakin' dollars for a cup of cat poop?!!!! Okay! I'll try it!

Wow.....so this is what poop tastes like 😯

no wonder I smell farts 🙄

Lightwolf

When I die...I want to go peacefully in my sleep...like my Grandfather did...not screaming like the passengers in his car.

September 1, 2014
6:48 am
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gudskepteacal
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😆

Hey man, this stuff tastes like

"History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and its issuance." - James Madison

September 1, 2014
8:35 am
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gudskepteacal
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Catch 'em! STOP 'EM!! They have the beans...

"History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and its issuance." - James Madison

September 4, 2014
6:31 am
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gudskepteacal
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Heeere kitty, kitty, kitty...

"History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and its issuance." - James Madison

September 9, 2014
9:46 pm
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Lightwolf
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If this is what you call "dark ice" how did corn get in it?

Lightwolf

When I die...I want to go peacefully in my sleep...like my Grandfather did...not screaming like the passengers in his car.

September 9, 2014
9:47 pm
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Lightwolf
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Oh boy....floaters

Lightwolf

When I die...I want to go peacefully in my sleep...like my Grandfather did...not screaming like the passengers in his car.

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